IT'S OVER!

Ladies and Gentlemen, the 2006 NFL Eliminizer has ended in a double-loss tie between Asanka and Mike Pettypeice. According to rules laid down in ancient times by men long forgotten, the pot shall be divided 75/25 in favour of the competitor with a more impressive Chicken Index.

Therefore, allow me to present your winner of $131.25:

Asanka 2006 NFL Eliminizer Champion, Cowardly Week 1: Detroit 6, Seattle (-6.5) 9 Week 2: Indianapolis (-13.5) 27, Houston 10 Week 3: Cleveland 14, Baltimore (-6.5) 15 Week 4: Philadelphia (-11) 31, Green Bay 9 Week 5: New England (-9.5) 20, Miami 10 Week 6: San Francisco 19, San Diego (-10) 48 Week 7: Cleveland 7, Denver (-4.5) 17 Week 8: Chicago (-16) 41, San Francisco 10 Week 9: N.Y. Giants (-13) 14, Houston 10 Week 10: Atlanta (-8) 13, Cleveland 17 Chicken Index = -98.5

And, more importantly, your winner of $393.75:

Mike Pettypeice 2006 NFL Eliminizer Champion, With Valour Week 1: Detroit 6, Seattle (-6.5) 9 Week 2: Cincinnati (-10.5) 34, Cleveland 17 Week 3: Cleveland 14, Baltimore (-6.5) 15 Week 4: St. Louis (-5.5) 41, Detroit 34 Week 5: Chicago (-10) 40, Buffalo 7 Week 6: Denver (-15) 13, Oakland 3 Week 7: Indianapolis (-9) 36, Washington 22 Week 8: N.Y. Giants (-9) 17, Tampa Bay 3 Week 9: San Diego (-12.5) 32, Cleveland 25 Week 10: New England (-10.5) 14, N.Y. Jets 17 Chicken Index = -95

That's right, kids: G.I. Joe has beaten the Transformers once and for all. See you next year!